I was thinking...

I was thinking of why I never patched things up
All the years of distance
Where my life could’ve been full instead of an empty cup
When I thought, touched, felt, suffered and lived would’ve been of substance

I was thinking why I made all those years
Seem bitter and ignorant
Then I knew I was being arrogant
There should’ve been a lot of laughter instead of tears

I was thinking how life would turn out
If we’d been friends all this while
And I saw myself having endless conversations, each ending with your smile
But I’m glad for all that happened for now I see you and I, sprout

I was thinking if I’d been your companion
Ever since the younger days of innocence
How then would things be in our relation?
Then I see you, your smile, your perseverance

I was thinking why someone like yourself
Would find falling in love an obstacle
But if you’d looked clearly you’ll see there’s someone who’d prove himself
And I’m sure if you allowed him to lead a journey with you, you’ll reach your pinnacle

I was thinking of saying those three words
That’ll give hope and instate faith in a person’s heart
I was thinking of telling you that I’ll miss you
How you managed to provide me with inspiration
I was thinking how wonderful you’d be as an aspiration
But at the end of the day the choice comes to you
Whether you decide on making me a passion or telling me to part
So I tried telling myself those three words
I saw I could do many things
For your presence, life it brings

I don’t want my reverie to be broken by a waking
For the all the awe, all the dreams would only be me thinking
Now and then, I tell myself, I was only thinking…

* a dedication made 2 days before i departed for Dunedin. A poem written in the nocturnal night, in the corner of my heart. Consequences, i'll face. I'm just too tired of running away. If it must be all i give then be it.
Hesitate and this heart shall feel no more.