Possibilities Endless

I've felt this before. I've tasted it and I've lived it. But still the same feeling of disappointment and shattered hopes dwells in the soul, lingering amidst the already saddened heart. Yesterday and this morning were immeasurably great. First of all AirAsia had 9.99 deals going on to KL + heaps of others, so for this please check out the website @ www.airasia.com.my .

Intentions and plans became a reality, I need to break away from this place I call home for a little while and all seemed possible. Work turned out amazing as the only time I had left to ponder on anything else, was the last 15 minutes of work where I spent organizing my payments and figuring out the best way to finance my plan.

She made yesterday great. She made today a living dream. All this happened when she made my heart felt wishes come true. She was coming back. I was already counting the days till I see her again. Don't get me wrong, and I know I've mentioned some things concerning this whole EMO geek people tend to refer to. But this is a benchmark beyond any other I've set for myself. She's reachable, she's beautiful and more importantly when I was left to rot in the silence of the night, she came and brought along with her, the sound of life. The sound of a heart beating constantly like how she has always done so.

This all ended at 7.30pm tonight, when she texted and said,"Change of plans. I'm not coming home. " There are 1 million things running through my mind and I can't even find the right places to begin this whole misery and joy I've experienced today but I can say this, possibilities are endless.

- viva la Fookchow Familia -

Hurt

I hurt myself today
to see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
the only thing that's real
the needle tears a hole
the old familiar sting
try to kill it all away
but I remember everything

what have I become?
my sweetest friend
everyone I know goes away in the end
and you could have it all
my empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

I wear this crown of thorns
upon my liar's chair
full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
beneath the stains of time
the feelings disappears
you are someone else
I am still right here

what have I become?
my sweetest friend
everyone I know goes away in the end
and you could have it all
my empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
if I could start again
a million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way


Johnny Cash - Hurt

The Intended Masterpiece

Thank you for making me relive the past 6 years of my life,
Thank you for being just another beautiful illusion of nothing.
Thank you for fixing my heart then ravaging it to its unrecognizable state.
The pain is present every waking moment
And how you shot that bullet straight through my heart, oh, how gracefully!
You left me crippled with the endless thoughts
How deceiving appearances can be!
Take your blatant truth for I'm travailing no more!
Gyrating your world was my only hope,
But in dreams you appeared next to nothing.
I thought we would paint masterpieces together
I thought we would be each others work of art.
Only coming to know instances of perfection with you was never.
You couldn't see me for all you held on to was him.
Why start something you can't even end?
Why start something you know would be so blissfully dead?
You never saw me, you never felt my heart beat.
Our forever you made cloven,
No more shall I call you my home; my haven.
I'll trust my family, they never let me down.
I'll trust the Family, they always pick me up.
But I guess we'll never know if trust you'll ever be.

- I thank Charlene for the many inspirations and breaking my heart. Without you I'd never have written this -